L.L. J 'em well And as you all I am as hell
Woke up at on a Saturday morn' Hemmed my remote control, turned my on Then I reached for a since I don't use the picks And the was kinda cold so I put on my kicks
Walked to the and ate some cornflakes As I bop to a tape of Cut Creator's With hardcore, heavyweight, blast of hardcore and Cut Creator's fast
Jumped in the shower, it was hot So I there a hour 'cause I like it a lot Jumped out, dried off, put on the Denim Then I called up on the telephone
He told me 'bout a jam that I could do on 10 g's plus a Limo for one strong So I said, yeah, I was with it, up and got geared Got a glass then I brushed my beard
Rewound some of some Def Jam tunes As I waited for this freak to ring my bell at 12 o'clock came, the door crack The freak walked in a on her back
Put her on the rack, threw my [Incomprehensible] on Then I threw in a tape of the storm We drank Roundhill Cavern, ate mignons She said, "L.L., when you're gonna let me taste tongue?"
My skin got pale, I the tail Did it so hard I shoulda to jail She left, came over and we went outside Jumped in the BM to a joyride
Went up to A.J. in my black wheel I'm not a sucker on the corner to scrape up a meal The girlies sex, the fellas try to plex But those who end up with broke necks
Signed some autographs for a posse of Said, "It's L, baby, I down with Chic" We conversated with the skeezers for 10 minutes Then I jumped in my ride and the freaks the door
Due 'cause I'm a people think I do crimes They don't know I'm just a of hip-hop rhymes smile, try to call L.L. a hoodlum at times But he don't know my on his wife's behind
L.L. has iced all the washed up Vigilante of rap so to with the mob run from the cops, making suckers jock And I'm only 18 making more than pops
Tormentor of and boyscout boys And I dare any critic to call it Peeped at the clock, it 6:03 later to Creator and broke out with E
Went up to White for a chocolate shake Thinking 'bout a 100'000 that I'd soon Finished up the snack, jumped up, out my E-Love hit the and he made up a beat
Kicked a few lines, out the door tonight is a bore I'm in the mood for more We jumped in my ride, I took a at the time It was 7:30 and the show was at nine
L.L. Cool J soon stand at a jam thousands of people screaming, "Touch my hand" But since I had a plus a half for tat I was for the cutie who's my perfect match
Her name was Renee, her face was But she had the kinda body that made Jay play I said, "No need to rehearse", then I made my Said, "You got a good team, girl but you a new coach"
Said, "My name's L.L.Cool, if I may But I'm not here for conversation, I'm here to mix it up baby, wanna feel you grind 'Cause it ain't 5th and these ain't nursery rhymes"
"And I know you adore my sure side hardcore Check out the real L.L. closed doors So tell your buddies busy, tell your boyfriend beat it Forget the silk dress you ain't gonna need it"
"Unplug your clock, do with the light After five minutes or more you me say, that's right Your is bad and I heard you got a Caddy When we make you can call me daddy"
"I'm L.L. Cool J, say hey, I'm not a toyboy but I wanna play Promise you, I'm not wack I'm in the sack After that I you starving for me to come back"
"But in the meantime, put your digits And the time I see ya I'm going to town" Stepped from the freak, it was a quarter to nine When I to the jam I saw the crew on line
Took a trip around the side, so I could get If you call me a tiger, then the stage is my I rip, stomp and crush, heavy bands rust flaky knuckleheads I crumble up like crust
Walked in my room and then I heard four knocks They said, "L.L., running late and it's time to rock" Told Cut what the order would be Then I "Lord have mercy" and slapped hands with E onstage, I heard the girlies scream And that's the very moment I up from the dream